The Word is LOSS
Definition: Merriam-Webster Dictionary: an instance of losing someone or something
Posted 12/18/24
My Story on Loss
I am writing this with tears in my eyes. I have just lost another friend to an incurable illness. She was someone I came to know during my visits to my mom’s Senior Living Facility.
We met at the salon in the Assisted Living facility. We started a conversation, and it was one of those rare connections where you instantly “click.”
Ironically, we shared a birthdate, were both born in Brooklyn and lived on Long Island for parts of our lives.
In a note to her daughter after learning of her passing, I wrote about how she was dealt an unfair hand at an early age. She was only eight years older than me. I wished I had met her sooner. Her feistiness, drive, artistic talents, and love of life were contagious, even as she bravely fought her illness. I feel blessed to have called her my friend.
Over the past five years, I have met nearly a hundred people at my mom’s Senior Living Facility. Many have passed—far too many to count. Sadness and the sense of loss hits me every time. Some I had the pleasure of sharing stories and hugs with. Others, I knew by exchanging pleasantries as we passed each other in the hall. I am grateful for the sweet and caring connections I have made with each of them. And it is from this place of gratitude that I want to shift the focus of this story, from loss to appreciation, and how gratitude has helped me find solace. I hope that, after reading this, you might find the same comfort in moments of loss.
Senior centers typically offer three living options: Independent Living, Assisted Living, and Memory Care. These stages mirror the phases of life and the level of care required.
Watching friends and acquaintances travel their paths, I take note. Some face their challenges with optimism, strength, and unwavering smiles. They affirm their resilience through their words and actions, and I learn from them. Others find themselves overwhelmed by loss—their health, independence, and joy. From them, I learn too. The question that often comes to mind is: How prepared are we for these inevitable changes? Can we ever truly be ready?
What I’ve discovered is this: with gratitude, we can make the most of every moment—past, present, and future.
The past allows us to relive cherished memories. We can revisit those happy, more active times through photographs or hearing stories retold by friends and family.
The present invites us to find meaning in the here and now. Even simple acts—reading a book, calling a friend, attending a community activity—can give purpose to our days.
The future, while unpredictable, is still ours to dream about. What if we dared to ask for what we truly want? Whether it’s a special request for your next birthday or holiday, or a bold new vision for your life, take charge of your dreams and watch them come to fruition.
As the holidays approach, I want to leave you with this comforting thought: Grief is an acknowledgment that someone matters to us. So, as you reflect on the loss of a loved one, this holiday season, remember all that remains because they were part of your life. Recall the joy they brought, the lessons you learned, the shared laughter and tears, and the quiet moments. Be grateful for all that you are—past, present, and future—because they were in your life. Know that a part of them stays with you always when you let it.
I wish you a happy and healthy holiday season. May it be filled with heartwarming stories of the past, the present, and dreams for the future.
If you need guidance in navigating your feelings of loss, please contact me for a free consultation. Let’s rediscover those losses through gratitude and love. Email me at innervoicelifecoach08@gmail.com—I’m confident our time together will be well spent.
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